Conspiracy Theories Regarding the Flood of 30 Pierrepont

POTSDAM, NY

Residents of local night club 30 Pierrepont, otherwise known as The Dirty Thirty, woke up this morning to four inches of water drenching their home and all of their worldly possessions. The great flood of  October 2016 not only came with a few broken laptops, but also one big conspiracy theory about the absence of one of the residents.

Noah, age unknown, a mysterious man seemed to go missing just one day before the flood.

“I found it weird when he started gathering two of each animal in our backyard a few days before the flood.”

A member of 30 Pierrepont told The Plague, “He told us the huge ark behind our house was an architecture project.”

His roommates told The Plague that Noah had been shedding tears almost every interaction they had with him this week.

“He’d lean into me for a hug and whisper things in my ear like, “God chose me but it should’ve been you.”” His roommate said, “I thought he was on acid.”

Noah and his architecture project have been gone for more than 24 hours, and as rain keeps falling down on Potsdam it is really stirring some thoughts.

However, Erik Viner has another theory regarding the flood:

“I have a poltergeist and it’s coming for me. It blew up my water heater and its only a matter of time before the whole town is under.”- Erik Viner.

Viner, a Potsdam senior who wears glasses, told The Plague that he has had many encounters with this poltergeist and that he doubted his roommate Noah would be chosen by God for such a huge project.

“The poltergeist used to randomly flush my toilet. It is definitely him.”

Devine happenings and ghostly encounters aside, 30 Pierrepont residents are closer than ever.

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