POTSDAM, NY — The Potsdam Village Board of Trustees will hold a public hearing to discuss a proposal by local real estate overlord Barry Mazen to open a new adult entertainment club at the old Northern Music & Video, 29 Market Street.
“It’s a good idea,” said Mayor Ron Tischler. “The nearest nudie joint is at least an hour away in Cornwall, 2 hours to get to the decent ones in Ottawa or Montreal. If you don’t have a passport, you’re looking at a 3 hour drive to Syracuse or a 4 hour drive to Albany to get a lap dance. This proposal will fill a longstanding opening in the regional economy and I look forward to reviewing it.”
When asked whether the new establishment will serve alcohol, Mazen demurred.
“I serve enough booze in this town to drown both college hockey teams,” he boasted. “My proposal will be a so-called ‘juice bar,’ which removes the significant expenses involved with securing a liquor license. It will also permit me to set the age of entry to 18, which expands the customer base significantly.”
Mazen stated his new establishment will add up to 25 new jobs to the local economy.
The hearing is scheduled for February 21 at the Potsdam Civic Center.
The Potsdam Plague 
Are you kidding me, what a joke are town is
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This doesn’t sound good to me,This kind of business will only prompt Drugs,Crime,Violience,Whitch we have enough of already with two colleges here,Let Mr Tischler travel to his entertainment and keep our town safe!
Are you kidding me? Living in Syracuse, the strip club located here that you speak of have declining real estate surrounding these establishments. Your need for sexual stimulation should stay in your pants along with your need to exploit women.
This is a blessing for this town. 25 new jobs is the best news I’ve heard in years.
Not everyone is related to the family run restaurants in town and few people manage to get those cushy positions at Stewarts’. I’d rather have my daughters working hard like true Americans instead of sitting at home waiting for Stewart’s to start hiring again.
i love this because as a college student, i would love to see A Titty
I don’t see this as a good thing.That is right in down town Potsdam.You will loose more business then you think you will create. It will cause decline in real estate.I have often spent a lot of time with my child on that strip of real estate so the question real is what kind of town are you choosing to become you will loose family’s.We love things like fright night yep that would be off the table for most of us with a family.How about a boys and girls club? Something for our future which would be our kids.I moved back to the north country from a city because i wanted more family values.I understand need for Jobs in this area believe me as we struggle right now but there has to be another way.Something that brings Jobs but keeps up values we hold dear.Any one can have a strip club i mean seriously think out side the box.Find away to create Jobs and enhance our children’s future so they can bring real work to this place and build up our economy. Not feel stuck that this is the way it has to be or for our daughters to think there is no other way to make an income then to sell myself. Just thoughts from a long time residence who wants the best for her community.
Is this a legit thing? haha
No, this is a satirical news page.